Recap: Vampire Diaries 5×13 – Total Eclipse of the Heart

I know, I know, I’m late again. I have an actual valid excuse this time (exams) but let’s just not dwell on this and instead go on with the episode, yes?

Personally, I think Katherine overtaking Elena’s body is an amazing move, I enjoy it very much, even though it’s hard to recap. Katherine, in Elena’s body, pretending to be Elena, except for when she isn’t, while everyone thinks she is –


Wrong fandom again?

Anyway, Katherine absolutely agrees with me on the awesomeness of that move:


Oh, and just as that last shot suggests, Katherine is writing all of that in her diary. To make sure there is written proof of her hijacking Elena’s body? Seriously, girl, why?

At college, Caroline wants to start fresh – no more ex-boyfriend drama! To celebrate that, she wants to attend Whitmore College’s Annual Bitter Ball, a dance to celebrate broken hearts. Personally, I think it’s amazing how there always is a dance that fits their current situation.
Bonnie gets slightly distracted, cause next to her sits a girl that lets a pen spin by magic. I mean, it’d actually be a little interesting to see how Bonnie copes with not being a witch anymore. Except, I don’t care much for Bonnie, so…

Stefan returns home to find Damon’s horribly parked car in front of the door (and I mean really horribly. As in, I could park better and the first thing everyone learns about me is that I can’t park.). Also, he finds Aaron’s body in the trunk. Unpleasant. I had hoped that Aaron would come back some way, but uh… obviously not.
Inside, Stefan wakes Damon.


Enzo arrives and says that actually, it was his idea. Damon tells his brother that he doesn’t want to be saved, he’s going back to his old, evil self and he’s happy about it.

Katherine called up Matt to test her upcoming call to Stefan. Nadia takes the phone and asks her how long this is going to go on. Katherine suggests Nadia might not be so sad that she needs to hang out with Matt. Nadia hangs up before she needs to have a long, embarrassing talk about her love life with her mother.

In some abandoned hospital, Dr Frankenfield has built his lab up again! Hello there, Frankenfield! How have you been doing? I almost missed the guy and his pretty face.
Anyway, he turned another vampire and wanted to that vampire-cannibal-thing on him, but he gets interrupted. Some woman walks in and tells him that she wants to support Augustine. Frankenfield says he’s done going to bed with potential benefactors. Did he really? He had all of Aaron’s money, why would he-? When? And… what???? Mind=blown. At least, Frankenfield is always good for a surprise… Apart from that, uh, she tells him that Aaron is dead ( found the car) and Frankenfield’s probably next.

All right, so, Damon and Enzo have captured Dianne Freeman, head of Campus security and locked her in the Salvatore cellar. They want to know where Frankenfield is, but she doesn’t know, so they kill her.

Enzo goes to take care of the bodies. Stefan arrives because he wants Enzo to leave, pronto. Enzo says he won’t and Stefan stabs him with the shovel. Enzo is unfazed because he’s been stabbed a whole lot already. So, Stefan tells him that if he doesn’t GTFO, he’ll kill him for good.


That shovel-drop, man. Almost as good as Klaus throwing a violin of the balcony.

At college, Katherine is dressing up. Caroline says no one is fooled and Katherine gets appropriately anxious. But Caroline just thinks she puts on a show about not missing Damon. Just then, Stefan calls and wants to tell her about Enzo, but Katherine hilariously enough doesn’t know who Enzo is.
Katherine invites Stefan to the dance, but he’s not really into it. Still, she manages to convince him.

At the Grill, Tyler arrives and wants to drink to forget Caroline. You don’t get any pity from me, mate.
So, he calls Nadia over and they start talking about how horrible their parents were/are. They also recall that one time in Season 1 that Tyler made out with Matt’s mom. Sometimes I forget that Tyler has always been douche.


Glad we addressed the issue.
Well, Tyler walks off and Nadia compels Matt to tell her about Enzo, so she can update Katherine. Unfortunately, Tyler turns around once more and sees that.

At college, Bonnie has invited Jeremy to dance, but not officialy, because it’s single-celebration dance, so- I don’t really know what their point was. They never got around to go, anyway, because Damon arrived with the plan to force Bonnie to do a locator spell by kidnapping Jeremy.
Bonnie says that A) she’s not a witch anymore and B) Elena will kill him.


How high are the chances that any of Elena’s doppelgangers want to play baseball with Damon? The depressing thing is, they’re all over their with their respective Stefan doppelganger. Isn’t that just sad?

Speaking of Stefan, he did drive over to college for that depressing dance. He and Katherine dance and she starts flirting, but he’d rather talk about Damon. Yeah.

Meanwhile, Tyler tells Matt that he’s been compelled. Matt first doesn’t believe it, but Tyler points out that the vervain bracelet is missing and he suggest drinking some vervain ASAP.

Bitter Ball: Caroline appears and takes Katherine along to the shredder. She wants “Elena” to stop flirting with Stefan because… things are complicated? I don’t care, mainly because Caroline doesn’t only shred pictures of Tyler, which I get. What I don’t get is this:


That beautiful, beautiful, romantic drawing. HOW COULD YOU, JULIE PLEC?


I know you do.

Meanwhile, Bonnie and Damon enter. Bonnie has this idea to ask the girl that she saw in lecture earlier. The girl’s name is Liv, which Bonnie learned from excessive stalking. If she did that now or earlier, we don’t know. Just saying.

Caroline goes to talk to Stefan, who confesses that Aaron is dead, which he has yet to tell “Elena”. Damon arrives and reveals his evil masterplan, showing a photo as proof that he has captured Jeremy. Katherine joins them and looks at the phone.


Haha, oh, Katherine.
Katherine calls  Nadia and inquires if maybe, she can just let Jeremy die and gain Stefan’s pity? I don’t find that nearly as horrible as I should. It’s more hilarious because Nadia is horrified at the suggestion and Katherine’s all, “Can’t we just let him die??” Granted, Nadia’s more concerned that Katherine will blow her cover, but still.
Besides, Katherine is very interested in whether or not Steroline is actually happening and she orders her daughter to ask Matt about that.

So, Nadia asks Matt about that, who says that he has no idea. He asks why she keeps asking all that questions about Elena and she compels him to forget. After she leaves, Tyler appears and wants to know if he was right, but Nadia figured it out, returns and snaps his neck. Sadly, I don’t have a celebratory gif for that, just know that it was satisfying.
I don’t really know why exactly I hate him so much. His whinery, the dumping Caroline, conspiring against Klaus and threatening a pregnant girl, it all just adds up.

Meanwhile, Bonnie tries to persuade Liv to help them, but the girl has no real interest in that.


She’s convinced now.

After a cut, they are attempting a locator spell, but Liv doesn’t really dig it, because she’s afraid she’ll blow something up.


Liv says she’s set things on fire and hurt people and she’s just scared. She can’t do it.
Just then, Enzo calls Damon:


OKAY. Enzo threatens to really hurt Jeremy now.
Enzo wraps a plastic bag around Jeremy’s face and chokes him. Why couldn’t you just snap his neck? Why make him suffer? Ugh, I hate Enzo.

Over with Bonnie, she tries to convince Liv that she can learn to control it. Also, Jeremy’s cute and willing to spend the night in a hotel room with Bonnie, so please put some effort in it!

Katherine has luckily recognized Jeremy’s surrounding (Whitmore House, where she attend that party during which she stole the sandwiches). She and Stefan come to Jeremy’s rescue. While Stefan battles Enzo, Katherine tries to revive Jeremy via CPR. She doesn’t get it completely right, but still manages to get him alive again. She looks kinda disappointed, though.
Damon walks in and announces that Frankenfield is in Richmond, so he and Enzo make to leave. As they’re about to leave, Stefan calls out to him once more:


Ouch. Damon shortly looks hurt and then, he has himself in check again and says he didn’t plan to.

At the Mystic Grill, Matt convinces Tyler that Nadia only compelled him so she’d have someone to talk. Tyler advises him to stay away from Nadia and Matt says he will.
After Tyler has left, Matt gets into a car with… Nadia! Right, there was no suspense whatsoever. In a surprising move, though, Matt figured out what happened to Katherine:


Nadia gets angry and says they’ll have to bleed him off the vervain so he can’t talk.

Enzo and Damon arrive at Frankenfield’s lab. Damon says Enzo can be the one to kill Frankenfield.
Unfortunately for them, the girl that met with Frankenfield earlier was a Traveller and they take the two down long enough for Frankenfield to stab Damon with the vampire-cannibal-poison! OH DAMN.


Yup. He feeds on the guy so hard that his head falls off. Enzo joins him and says he sees why that might be a problem.

So, that is actually very interesting! Damon’s going all ripper now… who is he gonna kill next??? (Suggestion: Tyler. Or just Enzo, Enzo’s a dick.) I love Katherine as Elena, confusing as it may be. What’s up with Caroline, though? PLEASE, Julie. You’ve ruined a lot. Don’t let Steroline happen, too!
Do tell me your thoughts on this episode and I’ll see you after the Olympia-forced hiatus! Have yourself a lovely day :)


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