Recap: Vampire Diaries 5×07 – Death and the Maiden

You know what’s going to save me? The mere fact that there was no Originals last Tuesday and that there’ll be no Vampire Diaries this Thursday due to Thanksgiving (happy Thanksgiving? Does one say that? Cause over here we don’t celebrate that…) ANYWAY. I’m so late, but I finally managed to watch Death and the Maiden. There were maidens (sort of) and oh, there was death. Death count is going to be so high again this season…

As always, let’s start at the beginning. That first scene makes me regret again that we’ll have to say goodbye to Silas. He’s hilarious.

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He’s waiting for the bus, see, and tells the couple waiting with him all about his misery. They think he’s crazy, but guys, he’s only 2000 years old. Clearly not crazy, duh.

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Told you. Hilarious. Then, of course, he liquefies the man’s inner organs and that’s not so hilarious. His reaction to the woman running off is funny again, though.

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The bus arrives and he gets on. Blood drop.

At the Salvatore Boarding House, Elena arrives in Stefan’s room. She says due to him losing his memories she felt like she lost a friend. Sure, Elena. This is totally an appropriate thing to say because losing one’s memories is so shitty because your ex-girlfriend will feel bad. Oh no, wait. It’s shitty FOR YOU because YOU LOST YOUR MEMORIES. Elena is the. worst.
Stefan reveals that he’s got his memories back and there’s hugging. He doesn’t look too happy, though. Maybe because Elena sucks.

We cut down to the parlour. Damon wants to check if he really does have his memories back.

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Stefan crushes his glass at the memory of drowning in the safe. Before he can explain himself, though, they get interrupted by Amara going berserk in the cell. She’s yelling at people no one can see before biting her wrist to let herself bleed to death. Damon bursts in and stops her.

Jeremy talks to Bonnie and wants to tell her that he loves her. She says she doesn’t want to hear it because it sounds too much like goodbye.
I really wish I cared more about the Beremy storyline but I just have no f**ks to give. #sorrynotsorry

At Dr Frankenfield’s lab, he tells Katherine that he checked her blood and nothing’s wrong with it. He speaks into his mic that she’s irritable bu the doesn’t know whether it’s symptom or personality. She smashes the devices against the wall and says it’s personality. Katherine is the best. (Ain’t it ironic that Nina Dobrev plays both the worst and the best? She’s awesome like that.)
Anyway, Frankenfield tells her that she’s just aging rapidly and there’s nothing he can do. She has a few months. NO KATHERINE. They’ll find a way, right? They’ll find a way. If they kill Katherine, I swear…

Silas is on the bus when Damon calls him. Damon wants him to hurry the fuck up while Silas muses about high gas prices. Also, Silas decided that if he can’t be happy, then nobody can and he won’t help Damon bring Bonnie back.

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Caroline is calling Jesse, who still hasn’t called her back, probably because he’s busy being Frankenfield’s monster. She runs into Nadia, who almost reveals that she’s Katherine’s daughter. Katherine turns up in time to interrupt her, though and says Nadia is her stylist.
Caroline leaves and Nadia forces Katherine to sit with her.

At the Boarding House, Damon tells his brother and Elena about Silas’ new douchery. Elena doesn’t want to give up getting Bonnie back but Stefan only cares about killing Silas. She says that now that he remembers, he has to know she never gives up. He says she always puts her trust in the wrong places and people.
Harsh, but true.

In the cellar, Jeremy and Bonnie watch Amara talking to herself, because it’s totally okay to treat human beings as if they were in a zoo. Anyway, Amara can see and touch Bonnie, but she pretty much freaks out when Bonnie attempts to actually touch her.

From this, Bonnie gets an idea. She wants to replace Amara as the anchor to the Other Side. Honey. Have you really looked at Amara? She’s completely nuts. Do you honestly think this is a good idea? Anyway, Elena thinks that’s brilliant, because she’s got no brains. And because Damon’s whipped, he agrees to go to Qetsiyah to ask her to replace Amara.

He knocks and says he hoped they could talk. She says she hoped he was her Chinese food. Qetsiyah is such a bitch. I kinda like it.

In Stefan’s room, Elena begs him not to do something stupid, because she doesn’t want to lose him again. asdfghjklkjhgfdsa…
Whatever, Stefan says that he fears he’ll go mad thinking about drowning over and over again and he needs to kill Silas to make it stop.

At Qetsiyah’s, she says that she’d need a whole lot of power to replace the anchor. (She says that the moon is not full and the next worthy comet would come in a couple of billion years. How are a monthly occurence  and a rare comet alike in power? NO SENSE. Please, explain, Julie. I’d like to understand.) Finally, she figures that doppelganger blood would probably do the trick.

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It’s actually quite funny that Damon’s just as unnerved as I by all those doppelgangers. He deserves a badge.

You speak my mind

On with the show.

At college, Nadia isn’t so happy that Katherine just up and left her again. Katherine says she never left her but her father just took Nadia away from her. Also, she doesn’t want to bond.
Caroline shows up and tells Katherine that she needs to go to Mystic Falls, pronto.

Boarding House. Elena shows Qetsiyah the cellar, where they have tied Amara to a chair. She says that Amara launched a thousand doppelgangers.
So, people theorizing that there’s got to be a doppelganger every five hundred years. Did you heart that line? Did you? Cause that wouldn’t make for a thousand. You were wrong. (Just wanted to get that out of the way because I thought the theory was bullshit all the time.)

Qetsiyah says that yes, she’ll kill Amara once she’s not the anchor anymore but a normal human, because that way, she and Silas will spend eternity apart. Gosh, woman. Just let it go.

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Katherine meets Tessa in the foyer and says that in exchange for her blood, she wants Qetsiyah to stop the aging. Qetsiyah agrees and Katherine really shouldn’t have relied on that.

We cut to the drawing room where Nina Dobrev is on screen three incredible times. Awesome. Amara doesn’t know what a grimoire is.

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Hilarious. Tessa cuts each of their hands, making it really hurt with Amara and Katherine also doesn’t look happy. Elena’s merely smiling though.

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Qetsiyah starts the spell, but is interrupted by Silas who just causes the electricity to go out? IDK about his evil masterplan, guys.

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Two very good questions. Answer to one: Qetsiyah meets Silas in the Salvatore’s library. They fight and he stabs her. She says she loved him.

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Stefan calls Silas (because of course he’s got the number. What the actual fuck?) and says that he’s got Amara. He plans to take her away and keep her alive if Silas doesn’t show up ASAP.

Caroline finds Katherine, who is still bleeding. She offers her blood, but Katherine instantly coughes it up again. Turns out she can’t be healed by vampire blood anymore.

Elena finds Qetsiyah and quickly heals her so she can complete the spell.

Silas finds Amara tied to a tree. She says she still loves him but she has to die (the suicide message in here is kind of peculiar, don’t you think? Suicide = not okay, guys. Just so we’re clear. Unless you spent 2000 years tortured and entombed, but I guess that’s not the case). She wants him to kill her, but he hesitates because contrivance. Stefan appears and throws him against a tree, choking him. Silas tells him to suck it up, because he’s been in that safe for only three months, while Silas was in a tomb since Jesus walked the earth.
Stefan gets properly angry and stabs Silas in the heart.

Damon figures out that Stefan and Amara are gone while Qetsiyah continues her spell. Elena begs him to go and make sure Amara lives long enough for the spell to be completed.

Amara, meanwhile, stabs herself to be with Silas. Damon arrives and tries to heal her, but as she took the cure as well, she can’t keep the blood down. We cut back and forth from the spell to Damon and Amara while she dies. Damon is pretty desperate.

Jeremy talks to Bonnie, who wants to say goodbye now that Amara is dying. He tells her he loves her and she says she loves him, too. Then, though, they figure out that they can touch, meaning Bonnie is back! (Her role won’t change much. There, I said it.)
Elena and Caroline show up and freak out when they can see Bonnie. Caroline starts rambling about being roommates.

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Katherine walks over to Qetsiyah, who says that she learned her lesson about altering lifespans. She won’t help Katherine. She has cut her wrists and now bleeds to death. RIP, Qetsiyah. May you never return.

Qetsiyah,  as a ghost, shows up near Bonnie and says that she needs to pass through her. Bonnie starts screaming as Qetsiyah touches her because feeling death hurts.

In the woods, Stefan is burying Silas when Elena shows up. She says she feels so sorry for having the best summer ever while he was locked in that safe and he tells her he wanted it to be her and Damon to find him.

In college, Caroline tells Katherine she needs to go because the dorm is full again. She attempts to thank her for what she did, but Katherine quickly interrupts. She says Caroline shouldn’t forget that Katherine killed her and that they still hate each other. Caroline says they do.
I’d love a Katherine Caroline friendship. Seriously, wouldn’t that be awesome?
Nadia shows up and says she already packed. She wants Katherine to come to Prague with her. Katherine says that she won’t come with Nadia and that, in fact, they’ll never see each other again. (Clearly due to her rapid aging, but she doesn’t say that.)

We cut to Stefan in the woods again and see that he’s still plagued by the memories.

So, that’s the end of all that Silas mess, then. AT LAST. Silas was pretty darn funny in the last two episodes, but still that whole doppelganger mess really bored me. We can go on to more exciting plots then! Like… like… the not so secret secret society and Dr Frankenfield? That’s going to be… really… great. WHATEVER, maybe it’ll be better than I think.
I hope they find a way to save Katherine, because she’s clearly one of my favourites. Also – where the hell is Matt? He had the start of an important storyline and now he just disappeared from our screen for what? Three episodes? What’s he doing?

Maybe we’ll see next episode. Until then, have yourself a lovely day :)

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